


A Human's Purpose

by astriduniverse



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Corruption, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Lesbian Sex, Redemption, Romance, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:41:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23488510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astriduniverse/pseuds/astriduniverse
Summary: Astrid is Steven's fully human sister and an honorary "Crystal Gem." She wants a purpose of her own and finds it in an unlikely gem who hates her entire planet. ****WIP
Relationships: Jasper (Steven Universe)/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my first fanfiction although I have been reading them for a long time. I would appreciate any feedback, and I am planning on making this a lengthy boi. I know Jasper is a controversial character in the fandom, but I want to delve deeper into her motivations and personality to create a gay redemption arc for my misunderstood waifu. Thank you so much, and I hope you enjoy!

This was the last time you were waking up for donuts at 6:30 am. At least, that’s what you tell yourself. You should only be waking up before 8 if someone is dying or shattered. Looking ahead, you can see Steven’s excited waddle as he speeds toward the Big Donut. You weren’t a bad big sister, after all, you got up this morning just to take your brother to his favorite place to get his favorite donut from some of his favorite people. Sadie is by the door fiddling with the keys until Steven’s shouting causes her to drop them in surprise. 

“There’s my little buddy!” She giggles as she picks up the keys, and hurriedly opens the door to the shop, “Come inside, I’ve got something for ya! You too, (Y/N)!”

You silently thank whatever deity reigns over this Earth for the sweet angel that is Sadie as you walk across the sticky linoleum floor of the shop searching for the nectar of consciousness. Coffee. Well, to be honest, you really didn’t like it that much, and you would definitely be drowning any actual flavor in cream and sugar…but hey. It was better than passing out from exhaustion. You pick up the hot drink and a couple of donuts that came with it, and tell Sadie how much you appreciate it. Steven is waiting outside, almost vibrating by the pure energy he has in his body. He’s always been this way. You remember holding him after he was born. Everyone was in shock of truly losing Rose Quartz, and you could see the tears starting to form in all of their eyes as they realized the reality of the situation. And then Steven started giggling…and giggling…and he wouldn’t stop until all the tears in the room were from laughter. You feel your face cracking into a smile as the chubby boy bounces over. 

“We should have a race home, and whoever wins…GETS THE LAST COOKIE CAT IN THE FREEZER!” You break into an all-out sprint as Steven sputters before moving as fast as his little legs can carry him. You watch behind you to see Steven bounding forward and smirk. You're obviously going to let him win. You ARE the best sister ever after all, “Ow!” You shout. Steven takes the opportunity of your “leg cramp” and runs up to the door.

“I WON! I WON! Wow, you didn’t stand a chance against…against…SPEEDY STEVEN!” You feign the cramp further and all but drag your leg to the door while Steven laughs. “That’s not even fair. You’re faking it, aren’t you?” He crosses his arms and pouts as hard as he can. You laugh and pinch his cheek while pushing him inside the house. The Crystal Gems look up at the commotion of Steven rushing through the door and to the freezer while you take a seat at the kitchen counter.

Amethyst runs across the room at the two of you, “Woah, sick hair, (Y/N)! Dude, how did you get it so-“

“(F/C)! (Y/N) UNIVERSE. WHY IS YOUR HAIR (F/C)?!” You can hear Pearl squawking like a mother hen and let your head fall onto the counter with a satisfying thud. Amethyst’s hands start threading through your freshly (F/C) hair, playing with it in wonder.

“I can’t just change my hair color like you guys can I have to dye it!”

“You are going to damage it! You know I read extensively about the damage that these chemicals can have on organic life forms and their hair. Oh! I think I already see a split end.” She picks up a single strand of hair and lets it fall down slowly. “See, it looks like your hair is already DEAD!”

“Well, I hope so, it’s supposed to be.” You say with a teasing lilt and watch Pearl sputter and walk away talking about “teenagers” and “unbelievable rebellion.” Garnet is smiling at you and pulls down her shades to wink at you with her third eye. To put it nicely, Pearl doesn’t get a lot about being human. Steven is different because “technically” he is a gem. But (Y/N), you are just a run of the mill human. You're both Greg’s kids, but you were born years ago from his high school sweetheart. You remember living with both of them as a young kid, and that your mom wasn’t too happy about your dad’s "singing career". They used to yell. A lot. About what was right for Greg, what was right for the family, what was right for you. You don’t remember the night your mom left, but you do remember Greg setting up a van with room for both of you and driving away. Your childhood wasn’t bad. You got to tour the world, meet new people, and most importantly, see your dad happy again. But even with that, you missed out on so many human experiences you should've had. That's why you live with the gems. Steven and the gems have become your family and the closest sense of normalcy you've ever experienced. You chew the last bite of your donut before going to sit next to Garnet. 

“Can you give me a horoscope, Garnet?”

“Despite your insistence on using that incorrect word, I will look for you,” She takes a moment. You think that Garnet is closing her eyes, but you can never really be sure. “Ah, I see it.”

You sit up excitedly. “Well, what is it?”

“You’re a loser,” Garnet says deadpan as Steven begins howling with laughter in the background. At your frown, Garnet smiles. “(Y/N). I’ve told you many times. You have infinite possibilities. One of the most variable lives I have ever seen. You decide your future. Not me.”

That’s always the answer, but you want more. You want to know why you're here. Obviously, to protect Steven, and you loves your gem family, but…you feel lost. Steven’s purpose was to carry on a legacy of an amazing fighter and gem who fought for humanity. What are you? You sigh and walk over to your bedroom before you feel the ground rumble beneath you.


	2. Chapter 2

The Crystal Gems rush to the window to see a…giant green hand? The sky is dark, with a bioluminescent green cutting through the atmosphere. You feel your stomach drop before Garnet turns to you and says in a tone that leaves no room for argument, 

"Stay here with Steven and find cover. This is too dangerous of a mission for either of you. We will be back, but please stay safe."

The gems rush out the door towards the beach while you nod and take a deep breath, getting ready to put on a strong face for Steven.

"Come on, buddy. We've gotta get somewhere safe," You grab Steven's hand and lead him up to the loft where Steven's "bedroom" is. Turning on the TV, you turn towards the worried boy, "Hey. Listen Steven. They will be ok. They've handled worse than a hand and come back to us." That made Steven crack a smile, but he still doesn't seem convinced. 

"It's not fair."

"What do you mean?"

"They're always leaving me out! But I should be fighting there with them! I'm a Crystal Gem too!"

"I know you are a Crystal Gem, but you're also a human. They don't do this to leave you out, Steven," You lean down and pull Steven into a hug, "They do it because they love you, and because they want to keep you safe." He doesn't look entirely convinced, but he is enough to sit down on the bed and mumble about a movie. You smile halfheartedly and begin searching in the drawers for DVDs, "We have horror…um….fantasy…some thrillers…it really depends on what you want to-" You turn around and see Steven going through a pink portal on the back of Lion. Goddamnit. You can't have one normal day, can you?

Now you wouldn't say you're a slow runner, but compared to three alien warriors and a lion, you might not come in first place. You sprint across the sand heaving expletives with every breath until you hear voices. You let your body drop into the sand for a moment and look up at the scene before you. Garnet is shouting, and Pearl and Amethyst are…they are…Where are they is the real question? There is a giant woman that looks kind of like Pearl? You realize they must have fused. You don't know a lot about fusion; other than that Garnet is one. Steven isn't quite old enough to understand the concept, but at 19, you were enough of a real adult to understand. 

The hand starts moving in response to the giant woman creating a bow and arrow. It points directly at her, and you feel fear seize your body as you realize- Garnet doesn't know Steven is here. You push your body off the sand and run to shield Steven. You wrap your arms around his body as he yells, catching Garnet's attention. In the commotion, the giant woman shoots arrows that don't even leave a dent in the ship's surface, and the hand lowers itself to the ground. The palm opens as Pearl and Amethyst unfuse. A tsunami wave of sand rushes in the air, and the fingers dangle over the ground. 

You are still brushing sand off of your face as you see a giant green ball come out of the hand. This day has officially gained the rank of number four in "The Weirdest Days in (Y/N) Universe's Life." The ball rolls across the length of the hand onto one of the fingers. The finger drops as the bubble releases the gems inside. The first one to appear in her sight is green with a triangle head and her gem on her forehead. You can't explain it, but you think the gem looks…annoying. The gem says in a tone that grates on your ears,

"That's them all right! They're the ones who keep breaking my machines!"

Another gem comes up behind her. A huge gem. Probably the biggest gem you have ever seen. She was a light orange with her gem on her nose and was built like she could lift the giant hand she was standing on. Her skin was covered in strange markings that caught your eye... and long beige hair...God, you could thread your fingers through it all day- You snap yourself out of the trance. 

"(Y/N)! You useless lesbian!" You scold yourself under your breath. You look down at Steven, who didn't seem to hear you, thankfully. You straighten yourself up and look back at the orange gem who is…staring…right at you. Her eyes are a piercing yellow that almost commands subservience. You can already feel herself yielding underneath the gaze.

"This is it?" The gem rasps. Her voice is deep and husky, but still feminine and sends a spark down your spine. You push your feet into the sand, trying to anchor yourself as if the presence of the gem could blow you away. 

"Jasper," You hear Garnet whisper lightly with a hint of fear in her voice. You have never seen Garnet scared. Your worry increased. That was her name then. Jasper goes through each of the crystal gems mocking them before locking eyes with you again. Lapis Lazuli had sided next to Jasper and began telling her that you and Steven were only humans. Harmless. To let us leave. Jasper grimaced, 

"I know what a human is. You don't need me for this. Just blast them with the ship."

She turns and begins walking back toward the ship. Your grasp tightens on Steven. You can feel him starting to break free, and before you can say anything, he's running toward the enemy gems. The Crystal Gems are yelling at him to stay back but he only keeps rushing forward. The ship begins to light up and a blast becomes eminent. The sound of it hitting the beach drains out anything else. You squeeze you eyes shut and brace yourself for the worst. After 30 long seconds you pop an eye open. You're not.....dead? Or the afterlife is not as great as you had thought. You look up to see Steven using a giant pink shield to protect the gems. Had he… made that?

Jasper suddenly seemed interested in the gems again. She rushes to Steven, calling him Rose Quartz and ordered a widespread barrage from the ship. You get off the ground and watch as Jasper hits Garnet with an electric-looking weapon. A cloud surrounds Garnet, and all that remains of her are two gems in the sand. Your blood goes cold as you see Jasper move closer to Steven. Jasper's large hands grab Steven by the waist as she rants about war tactics and honor. Your brain is frantically trying to make sense of the information as you runs up to protect your brother screaming,

"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH HIM YOU CHEETO PUFF LOOKING ASS BITC-" 

With one swipe from Jasper’s free hand, you are sent flying across the beach only to land hard in the sand. Your head spins as black swims in your vision, and you can feel the edges deteriorating. You have a gut feeling you won't wake up to Steven saving the day this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in this Chapter we actually meet Jasper, although I can't really say it went well. Thank you so much for reading! Any and all feedback is appreciated :)


	3. Chapter 3

You were right. The first thing you wake up to is an obnoxious buzzing sound. You force yourself to open your eyes and see a giant sheet of yellow light in front of you. As you push yourself up onto your hands and knees, you turn your head and see the green prison cell you're in. Fuck. You're on the damn hand ship, aren't you? Before you can even think about what happened to Steven and the gems, you hear Jasper’s heavy footsteps approaching the door. You panic and attempt to look like you have a single ounce of dignity after being beaten so easily.

“Took you long enough to wake up. You humans are so weak and pathetic, I thought you might have just keeled over and died already,” Her voice booms loudly and echoes throughout the ship.

“You’ll have to try harder than that to get rid of me.” Jasper scoffs and lays her back against the wall with enough force for you to see a crack forming in the metal.

“Considering I barely hit you, I won’t have to try much harder next time, will I?” She lets out a catlike grin full of arrogance, and you feel a knot forming in her stomach. The gem is a horrible killer dead set on destroying her family and her planet, but she can’t help being intrigued.

“Where’s my family?” You attempt a threatening tone with the gem, “Do what you want with me. Just leave them alone.”

Jasper cracks a smirk and begins chucking with a deep and rattling sound, “You’re lucky I even bothered with you in the first place. I only came to that dust speck to find Rose Quartz and beat her into a pulp, but now…she’s chosen that helpless form. I wanted to show the diamonds just how far she’s fallen until I pummel her into shards.”

“Steven isn’t Rose! He has her gem, but whatever she did isn’t his fault. And if I’m of no use, why take me? You could’ve left me behind. You did it for a reason. What was it?” Jasper looks almost impressed at the human trying to stand up to her. She can tell you're cowering in fear behind your mask of bravery, but she admires the effort nonetheless. Even though you are still a puny human.

“The diamonds will have many questions about the Crystal Gems, their missions, their secrets, the cluster. It would be extremely difficult to get any of them to tell Homeworld about their plans, but a human they foolishly trusted,” Jasper turns to you. Her yellow eyes are almost gleaming with evil delight, “Well, I don’t think you’d take as much convincing to talk.” 

You feel the breath leave your body as you steps back against the wall and slide down slowly. No. you can’t abandon your family. You love the Crystal Gems, and as much as Steven is one, you are too. "I won't tell you anything," You say as you glare up at the gem.

Jasper slams her hand against a plate on the wall, and the yellow forcefield crackles away. She steps slowly into the cell before leaning over your head. Astrid can feel as Jasper’s hand comes up to linger on her chin before pulling her head up to look her in the eyes., "You know I can take anything I want, don't you? The second you make yourself useless to me, there's no reason for me to keep trash on my ship. Choose your words carefully human," she all but snears in your face. You can feel tears streaming down your face as the gem paces around the cell ranting.

“I fought in the first war on your miserable planet. The entire surface was worthless, and I could never understand why anyone would fight for it to be anything more than a kindergarten. The life forms were all disgustingly organic. The humans were ugly, despicable creatures,” Jasper grabs your neck and pulls you to eye level with her as she watches the tears fall slowly from your eyes, “But you’re beautiful, aren’t you? It almost makes me think Rose might’ve been right about protecting that dismal rock,” Your body drops to the floor and your knees ache as you watch Jasper's eyes harden. She stands up and reforms the forcefield between you, “A shame I’ll have to kill you anyway, isn’t it?”

You can only stare open-mouthed as the gem walks away. You wish Jasper hadn’t "attempted" to comfort you at all, but..she thinks you're beautiful? No. Your family is your priority, and no matter how intoxicating the woman is, she will never be on your side. Frustration rises in your mind as you realize how unfair this entire situation is. You need to get out of here, and you will bang on that fucking forcefield as long as it takes. You raise your fist and punch at it with all of your strength. Your hand immediately goes through. That was easier than you thought. With a cautious step forward as your bruised knees throb, you maneuver your body out of the cell. Time to find your gems.

You run down the hallways frantically diving behind walls at the softest sound of a footstep. You can’t get caught now. After checking down seemingly every hall, you manage to find Steven just as he is exiting his cell the same way you had. And Homeworld thought being human didn’t have its advantages.

“Steven, are you okay? Did they hurt you?” You whisper as you take your little brother into her arms and gives him the tightest squeeze.

“Hey! I’m always okay, but I am worried about the gems. You saw what happened to Garnet.” 

You did see, and you're scared too. Garnet had always been the strongest and most put together of the Crystal Gems, maybe because she is two of them, but still. You two scour the rest of the hallway before you find Ruby sitting alone in a cell and fuming. Steven immediately shoves his hand into the forcefield to free Ruby, and she rushes out and down the hallway in a flash.

“Hey! Wait!” Steven yells after her.

You giggle and ruffle Steven’s hair, “Go after her and help her find Sapphire. I’ll look for the others.” Steven nods with a determined grunt and goes after the hurried gem. You walk down the hallway until you can see a speck of blue at the end. You rush towards it and realizes who it is. Lapis.

The blue gem turns in her cell, so her back is facing you, “Go away.”

“Lapis, we can help you! Get you out of here. I know that the Homeworld gems are treating you like a prisoner just like the Crystal Gems with the mirror, but switching one prison to another isn’t the answer. Come with me. You can make a new, free life on Earth with us.” You reach your hand into the forcefield and wait to see if Lapis will move toward it.

Lapis snorts with indignation and stands before looking you coldly in the eyes, “I saw the way you looked at her, you know? You really think she would ever bring herself to be with a lowly human? She hates your planet. She hates your family. She hates you. The best thing you could choose is to crawl back into that cell and let Homeworld take mercy on you. The punishment won’t be bad if you do what they say but listen to me,” Lapis grabs her wrist through the opening in the field and drags her closer to the barrier. You can almost feel Lapis’ breath through the static as she hisses at you, “You will NEVER be one of them. Not to the diamonds. And not to her.” Lapis releases your arm as a bruise begins to form where she had gripped your wrist so tightly. You step away from the forcefield and walk back down the hall. You had thought Lapis was your friend, but you can’t listen to her right now. Homeworld wasn’t right about humanity or you. And you didn’t care about what Jasper thought either.

You only stop when you stumble upon a destroyed circular section of the ship where you can see Garnet and Jasper fighting brutally below you. Garnet seems to have the upper hand and is shocked when she notices you standing in the entrance. She discreetly motions for you to leave before Jasper notices your presence, but you feel glued to the floor. You just keeps staring at the orange gem, unable to take your eyes off of her. Jasper looks up from Garnet’s face as they circle each other, and notices the human’s presence. She smirks just like she did at your cell and looks back to Garnet.

“Guess I can give your human runt a preview of how she’ll be killed on Homeworld.”

Garnet’s face twists in anger as she charges Jasper and screams at you to leave. You move towards Jasper and see the anger brimming in the gem's eye as she rushes at you. Her entire body morphs and begins to spin after you as you take your place in front of the ship's reactor. Garnet is panicking as she attempts to interfere in anyway, but the quartz gem is moving too quickly for her to catch up. At the last second, you move out of the way and watch as Jasper is shocked by the ship and sent into a state of complete helplessness. You walk up to the gem and pray she can hear you. 

"You know what Jasper. You might be right. I am just a stupid human..but at least I don't lick boots for a fascist rock society," you say smugly and watch as the gem's face contorts into anger mixed with confusion s Garnet drags you to the control room of the ship.

You lean into the embrace of the gems and your brother, letting out a sigh of relief. You were so happy to know that your family is safe and going back to Earth. Well, if you made it there. As you felt the ship start to fall you realized it might not have been the best idea to let Jasper hurly herself into the engine. Garnet seems to agree and she shouts,

“The ship’s going down!”

Of course, it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I tried with this chapter to focus on Astrid's emotion and turmoil as she realized her attraction to Jasper and the implications that could have for her family. Any and all feedback is appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

At least you didn't pass out this time, you thins as you starts moving rubble from on top of you. You look up through the green fire and smoke around you, looking for the Crystal Gems. The only person you can see is Jasper, still underneath a pile of rocks. She doesn’t look like she’s awake, but she isn’t shattered. You crawls across the rough ground mixed with sharp, jagged metal over to the gem just close enough to touch. You struggleswith whether or not to help… that’s what a crystal gem would do, right? Your hand moves over and pushes a rock off of Jasper’s chest before resting over the Yellow Diamond insignia. 

You have to be honest with yourself. Lapis might’ve been harsh on the ship, but she was right. No matter how you feel about Jasper, you would never actually mean anything to the gem. Jasper comes from a world of regulations and rules where she is a leader. The only thing she knows is war, fighting, and obeying her diamond. She’s the perfect quartz. You would never come between that. It wasn’t even a competition.

“Can you stop staring at me and scrunching your face like that, human?” Jasper grumbles as you move your hand back in shock that you hadn’t noticed the gem had woken up. You start to retreat back to your cubby hole in the wreckage before Jasper grabs you roughly by the waist and pulls you closer, “I didn’t know you were a Ruby.”

“What do you mean?”

“Your face is turning red,” Jasper explains, and you can feel yourself growing more embarrassed by the second. You don’t know what to say or what to do. Everything about this is just so strange. You hear Jasper start speaking again, “What kind of Earth magic did you do to me?”

“What are you talking about?” Astrid asks.

Jasper slides down in the rubble until their faces are only an inch apart, and Astrid becomes inexplicably worried about the last time she brushed her teeth. How long was she passed out on the ship? A deep chuckle from Jasper shakes Astrid out of her worry as she feels a large hand move her hair behind her ear.

“I can tell when that little human brain of yours is trying to think …it’s cute,” Jasper whispers in her raspy tone. Astrid is so confused. This is the same woman who was threatening to kill her on an alien spaceship twenty minutes ago? Before she can consider the number of levels that this is psychologically confusing on, she feels Jasper’s mouth slant over hers. Her mouth is warm and moist but much less so than another human. Astrid feels herself reciprocating immediately and hates herself for it. Maybe for just a moment, she can let herself be selfish. Jasper pulls back first and slides Astrid into her strong arms on top of her chest. Her lips come back onto the human woman’s cheek, and she whispers, “Wetter than I thought it would be.”

It takes everything in Astrid not to make an innuendo as she settles against the gem’s warm body before teasing, “You didn’t like it, then?” 

Jasper sputters and immediately responds, “I never said that…” Astrid leans in to kiss the gem again before she can hear her name being yelled by the Crystal Gems looking for her in the wreckage. Fuck. Jasper brings her forehead to her lips for one last kiss before pushing her off of her, “Looks like it’s time for you to go then.” 

Astrid is confused by Jasper’s hot and cold behavior but climbs far enough away from her to not look suspicious before jumping out of the rubble and yelling to find her family. Amethyst whips her head around and screams her name as she bounds over. They wrap each other in a tight embrace, and Amethyst all but carries her to the other Crystal Gems. She was the last one left to join the group. They were ready.

“We don’t know where Peridot went in her escape pod, but Jasper should be here in the rubble somewhere,” Pearl briefs the group, “We should all stay together as she is too strong for any of us to take alone regardless of the crash-“

The huge gem comes out of the clutter surrounding them and glares at the group. She rushes toward them, stumbling and trying to catch her breath while she growls, “Don’t think you’ve won. You only beat me ’cause you’re a fusion! If I had someone to fuse with I,” Jasper pauses as rubble starts moving to her right revealing Lapis. Fear strikes her face as she creates wings and tries to fly away from the scene. Jasper grabs her by the leg as she rises in the air and rasps, “Come here, brat! Don’t fly off so soon. Lapis listen, fuse with me!”

“What?” The confusion is evident in Lapis’ voice. Fusing with gems of a different gem type is forbidden on Homeworld, and Jasper was still a part of their army. She was willing to betray her planet to win a fight? Astrid felt panic rising in her body. If she would go against her Diamond’s beliefs like this, Jasper was going to do anything to make sure the Crystal gems didn’t leave this beach alive.

Jasper begins shouting as she grabs the smaller gem’s face roughly, “How long did they keep you trapped here on this miserable hunk of rock?” She drops Lapis, and Astrid watches as she hits the ground hard while Jasper continues, “These gems! They’re traitors to their Homeworld. They kept you prisoner. They used you! This is your chance to take revenge! Come on, just say yes.”

“Lapis, don’t do it,” Stevens begs from beside you as Amethyst holds him back. Lapis doesn’t say anything as she extends her hand to Jasper, signaling her consent. The grin that crosses the gem’s face is almost demonic. She grabs her hand violently before they begin their fusion dance. Astrid watches and can’t help but feel jealous. Out of all the things she should be worried about right now, especially the giant space monster about to be created, she finds herself mad at Lapis for fusing with Jasper when she knew how she felt. At the end of the dance, Jasper makes eye contact with the Crystal Gems, and a blinding light emerges. Their fusion is enormous. Easily the biggest gem Astrid had ever seen. It was truly a monster with four eyes, multiple arms, and a deformed body. Malachite’s eyes slid from behind her head to look at the gems. The beast started cackling magically as it created a massive hand from the water. Astrid had just about had it with fucking giant hands. Right as the hand looked like it was coming for the group, it grabbed onto Malachite’s arm.

“Huh?” The monster voices her alarm at the chains suddenly locking around her wrist before another grabbed her other arm, “What?” Chains wrapped around the fusion’s torso and pulled her closer to the water, “What are you doing?”

Malachite’s face seemed to shift as Lapis began screaming, “I’m done being everyone’s prisoner. Now, You’re my prisoner! And I’m never letting you GO!” Two hands shot out of the water and grabbed the beast’s back legs before dragging her into the ocean. The fusion almost split as she was dragged deeper into the water until just her head was visible, “Let’s stay on this miserable planet, together!”

Malachite was dragged under the water completely and disappeared from sight. The Crystal Gems stared open-mouthed at the scene that had played out before them as well as the now placid water the fusion had submerged herself into. Astrid felt herself moving closer to the shore before Pearl put her arm out in front of her chest to stop her. Garnet was the only one to speak,

“Yikes. They are really bad for each other.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! So this chapter has Astrid and Jasper's first kiss even though their relationship is still extremely confusing. I'm also sticking pretty closely to the actual storyline hopefully, so sadly Jasper has to go underwater for a while. :( Any and all feedback is appreciated!


	5. Chapter 5

It’s been three days since Malachite was formed and dragged Jasper down to the bottom of the ocean. Astrid doesn’t know how to feel about it, but she does know she hasn’t been able to sleep since. Fighting gems, getting kidnapped, and having a crush on the alien trying to destroy your planet is a lot of trauma and complicated emotions for her to sort through. She doesn’t even know how to start. Getting up from the couch, Astrid starts to walk towards her own bedroom toward the back of the gem house. Since she is an adult, the Crystal Gems thought she needed more privacy than Steven would. She opens the door and steps into the simple bedroom with light pink walls and fluffy white carpet. The alarm clock blinks from the previous power outage in Beach City. 12:01 a.m. Another night of no sleep then. She climbs into her queen-sized bed packed with different colors of fluffy blankets. Every holiday or occasion ended in her receiving at least 3 blankets as Astrid’s list always included “Unlimited Comfort Items.” She huffs and plops back into a gray blanket decorated with white swirls. The swirls are so pretty the way they curl and twirl and…and…

Astrid looks down, and her feet are deep in water. Of course. She can finally get to sleep, but the dream has to be about the fucking ocean. Her feet are heavy as she lifts them through the water and walks around. The entire place is empty in every direction. Until her brain can come up with something more interesting, she’ll trudge through this watery hell. The ground underneath the water almost looks like glass, but it’s not clear. It’s blue everywhere and not in the normal ocean way. She is singing to herself softly and kicking the water up as she walks, looking for a sign of anything out of the usual. She giggles to herself and says,

“Hey, bitch brain! This is not what I meant when I said I wanted a wet dream.” She keeps laughing at her own bad joke. Honestly, anything made being in this place more interesting. How long has she been here? It feels like it’s been hours-

“GET OUT OF HERE! How are you even here? Never mind, I can’t get distracted. You need to leave! NOW!” Lapis is staring at her with eyes wide open and full of fear. Astrid screams as she is startled and slips back into a fall. She can feel the water drenching her dream clothes, and the hard surface underneath definitely left a bruise on her ass.

“Seriously, I have to deal with you in my dreams now too? Maybe I do need to go to therapy…” Astrid pulls herself out of the water and feels her skirt pulling with the weight of the water as it drips back into the ocean.

Lapis looks desperate with her as she begins pleading again, “You need to get out of here! I can’t hold her off for long if I’m not focused on-“ She cuts off and tears well in her eyes. Chains are attached to her wrists and start pulling her down to a hole. It looks as if the tunnel leads to a bottomless ocean beneath. Astrid hears a shriek as Lapis is pulled underneath the water, and a loud splash comes from behind as if something is emerging. She whips around to see Jasper panting and crawling out of a separate hole in the surface. Her legs are moving faster than her brain as she rushes over and kneels in the water.

“Jasper?” She asks tentatively. The gem is unresponsive and continues to look down as her chest heaves. Her arms are twitching, and her hands are clenched in tight fists. Just as Astrid is afraid Jasper is going to hurt her, she pulls the human into a loving embrace. The gem’s body shakes as Astrid holds her close. She moves her hand to Jasper’s hair and begins combing through it slowly with her fingers. It’s as soft as she had imagined and untamed like the gem herself. Her other hand moves to leave lingering touches up and down Jasper’s back as her shaking slows. Astrid becomes bolder in her affection as she leaves kisses along Jasper’s collarbone and chest. She isn’t quite tall enough to reach the gem’s neck or face at this level, but she makes do.

Jasper sighs in contentment and leaves a soft kiss on the human’s lips. An enormous amount of stress has been taken off her shoulders. She smiles as she says, “I needed that..not that I’m weak, of course. I’m the Ultimate Quartz! I’ve just been trapped here with,” Her face contorts in disgust, “I thought I was a brute, but she’s a monster.”

“I’m going to find you! I’ll get you out of here.” Astrid tells the gem with a determined gleam in her eye. She feels Jasper grab her hand and raise it up to her face to kiss it. The gemstone is cool against Astrid’s skin, and no matter how much she tries to deny it, she can feel her heart well up with feelings for the enemy gem.

Jasper looks at Astrid with a sadness in her eyes, “I’ll be going from one prison to another. Stuck with Lapis, stuck with the Crystal Gems, or stuck on Earth. If Lapis and I unfuse, I have to be able to get back to Homeworld. I can’t stay here.”

Astrid has so many questions she wants to ask. What would it mean if Jasper went back to Homeworld? Would there be another war? Would they come for Steven? What about the Kindergartens and the Crystal Gems and the corruption? One question left her mouth, “What about us?” It lingered in the air around them like a fragile bubble. Astrid was afraid to move or speak as she waited for Jasper to pop it.

“You know I can’t actually be with you, right? I can get you a nice spot in the human zoo instead of a death sentence. Still, even I can’t argue with the diamonds,” Astrid can feel tears threatening to fall as her heart rises in her chest. She looks down so that the gem can’t see her emotional state and tries to speak, but she can’t. Her heart feels as if it’s choking her as Jasper continues, “I’ve never experienced this human affection or romance before. It’s interesting but…I can’t love you or whatever you expected. I don’t even know what love is.”

Her body shakes as she moves away from the gem. As if on cue, Lapis rises from the other side with her water wings spread in the air. Jasper is gone, but the hurt is still there. And so is…an orange pebble? There hadn’t been anything other than the smooth surface underneath the water all this time. Lapis looks at Astrid with pity as the human grabs the rock and stands up from her place beside the missing gem. 

“Stop wasting your time.”

Astrid inhales sharply as she wakes up from her dream. Her body is still shaking and covered with sweat as she throws her legs over the edge of the bed. She can feel her legs are unsteady beneath her as she walks over to the bathroom and throws up in the toilet. Was that…a dream? It felt so real. The pain felt even more so, but how? Leaning against the bathroom wall, she brushes her teeth thoroughly and reviews the dream again. Though her mouth grew mintier, Astrid only became more confused. The two gems had been so in character the entire time. Was her brain capable of such detailed and accurate personality analysis? She turns the shower all the way up and goes back to her room to get new, not sweat-drenched clothes. After looking through her drawers, she picks out simple jean shorts and a floral crop top before walking to her nightstand to look for earrings. The alarm clock is still flashing. 3:30 a.m. So much for getting sleep tonight. The water is the perfect, scalding temperature as Astrid crawls inside and relaxes. It was time for a long-overdue self-care day, and she took her sweet time shaving and cleaning her body. 

She’s on her tippy toes as she sneaks into the kitchen for a snack without waking Steven, she swiftly grabs a cookie from the counter before retreating to her room. Good. She loves her brother, but in the middle of the night, Steven could be a little annoying. Snuggling into her blankets, she grabs her laptop and starts looking through Youtube. She leans back into the wall of fluff until she feels something hard pressing into her back. What the fuck? Astrid spring forward and reaches her hand to find the trespasser in her comfy fortress. She pulls out a rock and almost throws it out the window before she realizes. It’s the pebble. The one from her dream. The laptop is slammed shut, and she stares at the object in her hand. It was real. Time became irrelevant as Astrid rushes out of her room and bangs on the gem door for Pearl or Garnet. No offense to Amethyst, but she wouldn’t be much help in this situation.

Garnet opens the door, and Astrid almost hits her face on accident before she catches herself. 

“I need to talk to you.” The gem moves to the side, silently inviting her into the room. Astrid enters and looks around at the bubbled gems above them. She knew this place existed, but she’s never been allowed inside, “I saw Lapis and Jasper in a dream. I thought it was fake, but I brought this back,” She holds out the pebble to the gem.

Garnet scrutinizes it before speaking, “Just as I suspected, it’s a rock.”

“There’s nothing special about it?” Astrid asks.

“Other than that, it came from a dream, no,” Garnet answers as she hands the rock back. Astrid frowns and thanks Garnet before walking back to the door back out to the temple. So it was real. There was no way she could go back to sleep now.

***4 Days Later***

Pearl came over to Astrid’s spot on the couch. The human is obviously exhausted and about ready to pass out. Amethyst is laughing at Pearl’s sour expression as she sits beside her and begins to nag,

“How long has it been since you slept? You’re a human! You need to rest!”

Astrid rolls on her side away from the gems with a long exhale as Garnet speaks up,

“Maybe if we found Malachite, Astrid’s dreams would stop, and she could sleep again.”

As much as Astrid wants to rest, she doesn’t want to see Jasper right now. In a dream or real life. She was still hurting from how the gem had spoken to her. It was becoming harder to deny that she had genuine feelings for her. Love feelings. Astrid felt herself being tugged off the couch onto a mission to find the fused gem at the bottom of the ocean.

Maybe she should’ve just gone to sleep instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I was really debating on what to do with this chapter and Malachite, as Astrid is kind of cock blocked by their fusion. In this Chapter, Astrid becomes more accepting and begins to start to voice her feelings, while Jasper is still convinced their relationship is impossible. I think Jasper as a character is reluctant to humans and to the idea of staying on Earth, and although she is attracted to Astrid, she doesn't quite know how to navigate and identify her emotions yet. Any and all feedback is appreciated as always!


	6. Chapter 6

The choppy waves toss Astrid around on the raft as she stares down at the water below her. Every time she sees a blink of something orange in the water, she can feel her heart clench. She can feel hot tears slipping down her face, but she can't tell if they are from desperation or sleep deprivation. She feels someone wrap their arms around her waist.

"Dude, you're freaking me out right now being sad like this."

She turns her head to see Amethyst giving her a supportive hug. The purple gem isn't usually affectionate like this, and it is a clear sign Astrid needs to stop pining helplessly on the edge of the boat. She twists around to give her friend a proper squeeze before sitting facing the others in the raft. 

She sighs sadly and says, "I don't think we're going to find them today," The rest of the gems seem surprised at Astrid's sudden calmness about the situation, "Why don't we go home? I think Steven and I could use a rest."

Speak of the Devil, the boy immediately jumps up from his dozing state, attempting to look awake for adventure. The gems know better. The raft starts moving toward shore, and Steven crawls over to lay his head in his sister's lap. Astrid threads her fingers through the boy's thick hair as she watches the temple draw closer on the horizon. They don't say anything. They don't need to. When the raft finally scrapes along the sandy beach, Astrid carries Steven up to the door. He's sleeping like a rock, and she really doesn't want to wake him. She smiles down at the boy in her arms right as he exhales in her face. Ok, it's time to brush our teeth. She teases the boy,

"Steven, wake up! I might just…DROP YOU!" She keeps her firm hold on him while dipping down to make him startle. Steven shrieks before his cheeks turn a rosy red, and she glares at his sister.

"That wasn't funny!" He pouts.

"It was actually hilarious, besides, you know I would never drop you," She pushes his hair back out of his face and lays a kiss on his forehead. "You're too sweet. Now get to bed, little bro."

"I actually need to tell you something."

Astrid grows puzzled. He usually doesn't talk about serious stuff, even though there is a lot of heavy shit weighing on him. She waits a minute for him to speak before squatting down to be eye level, "What's going on?" She asks.

"I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I know you've been going through some stuff lately, and I honestly don't really understand it, but… You've always had my back. I have yours too. No matter what." Astrid could feel tears welling in her eyes as he spoke, and she wrapped her arms around him tightly, "I think you might squeeze me to death," Steven blurts out.

"You can't be cute like that and not expect to get a hug. Those are the rules," She replies as she looks down at her brother. He was becoming such a positive, supportive person, and she knew she and the gems had so much to do with it. Proud couldn't even begin to define the feeling she had as she watched his desire to help others grow and flourish. She watches him run off to brush his teeth before she walks over to her bedroom on the other side of the temple.

She closes the door behind her and makes her way to the bathroom. Her night-time routine was pretty basic just: brushing teeth, cleaning her face, taking out contacts. Pajamas were a complicated decision because Astrid hates things that are too confining. That means pants. And shorts. And anything else that would rub on her legs. She puts on a huge t-shirt and calls it a night. Climbing into bed, she realizes she isn't worried about sleeping tonight. If she sees Jasper, even if the gem says something, she is surrounded by people who love her already. She pulls the mound of blankets over her and closes her eyes. 

When she opens them again, she's back on the beach. The gems are sitting next to her with Steven, and everyone seems to be relaxing. A smile crosses her face as she pops up from her seat on the sand.

"Who wants to play volleyball?" Astrid exclaims, and her dream family smiles at her as they race over to the court. Team One: Pearl and Garnet. Team Two: Astrid, Amethyst, and Steven. They split to their sides with enthusiasm tangible in the air. Garnet serves, inevitably forcefully, and the ball catches flame as it speeds toward them. Amethyst turns herself into a tennis racket to whack the ball back down on their side. A look of panic crosses Pearl's face as she dives for the ball and shrieks,

"You'll NEVER score on this court!"

The ball comes back over the net gracefully, quickly intercepted by Steven. He hits it high into the air, where Astrid jumps to spike it over the net. Her slap lands the ball in the center of the opposing court. Neither of the other gems can reach it. Amethyst hollers and lifts the other two members of her team as she takes a victory twirl. Astrid calls a time out as she runs off to the side to grab some refreshing dream water. She takes a gulp before running back onto the court.

"Alright, guys! What's our play for round two?" She looks back and forth between her teammates as they both ignore her, "Um…Hello? Well, if you guys don't wanna talk to me, I'll go join Pearl and Garnet!" Still no response. The human walks over to the other gems hopefully, 

"They didn't want me on their team, so I thought maybe you two would-" They hadn't even looked at her. She waves her hand in front of Pearl's face, but the gem doesn't even notice. Her and Garnet's conversation continues like she wasn't even there. She feels a sense of dread looming over her. 

"No, no," Two giant chains suddenly emerge from the ocean, and she makes a break for the temple. The gems start playing volleyball again as if nothing were even happening. Astrid runs up the stairs as chains grab her wrists and pull her to the ground. Her body hits hard as a cloud of sand flies up in her face. The chains drag her closer to the water, and she begins screaming pleas for help. They fall on deaf ears, of course. She watches her family continue to play as if she doesn't exist. But they had just seen her!

Saltwater floods her senses as she is pulled deeper into the water. Just when she thinks her head will explode from the pressure, she suddenly stops. Her eyes open, and she is staring down at her hands. Were they always blue, or is it just the ocean? She looks at her outfit and feels the feeling of dread come back tenfold. She is…Lapis Lazuli? Before she can fully process, an influx of emotion and thought comes into her mind, but it isn't hers it-

"Jasper," she says, and her voice betrays two things: she is the blue gem, and she is scared. Astrid hears the gem huff across the distance. Her curiosity gets the better of her, and she looks up to see the gem in front of her. She looks exhausted and stripped of her dignity, yet still beautiful to the human. A pang of anger radiates in her mind from the larger gem. What else could she feel of hers?

"You think I like that I'm stuck here with you either? We could've had those Crystal Gems shattered and been back on Homeworld already. You're a fool. You'll never be one of them. How long did they trap you in that mirror and force you to watch them as you suffered in silence?"

That's not true. It can't be. The Crystal Gems would never leave someone like that, and yet- She remembers their happy faces as she was dragged here. They didn't even realize she was gone. They didn't even care. It must be how Lapis felt in her mirror.

"I know they did. That was the Crystal Gems before-"

Jasper snorts, "Before what? They started recruiting pathetic earthlings? Surrounding themselves with lower life forms to feel better about themselves. That's why they left you there. You were too powerful for them to handle, but I can use your power. Together we can bring order to this colony for the Diamonds!" Her eyes grow more crazed as she speaks.

Astrid stops breathing as she listens to Jasper ramble like a madwoman. She feels tears grow in her eyes as she realizes the gem she loves is truly a monster, "Steven and Astrid are different. They aren't weak, and the gems love them because they want to help protect this planet and everything on it!" She shouts with a force she doesn't even realize she still has inside her.

Jasper groans at the response and replies mockingly, "The humans! Of course! That's all you Earth gems talk about. Humans are the reason Pink Diamond is shattered, and why I have had to fight since I broke free of this planet's crust!"

Astrid strikes a moment of realization as she watches the gem's pained confession. The anger in her voice is tangible, but the feeling of hurt radiates in her head even more. That's why Jasper is so angry, so hateful. She is hurting badly.

She crosses the distance between the gems quickly before she rests her hand on Jasper's broad shoulder,  
"I understand why you're hurting, Jasper. You were made for her, weren't you? And you feel like you couldn't protect her. You're the best one of your gems made on this planet, a cut above the rest," She rests her hand against the side of the gem's face and tilts it up. Jasper's eyes are full of bewilderment as Astrid continues, "But that doesn't matter to you, does it? You weren't good enough to save her, so you have to spend the rest of your life, fighting and winning to prove yourself."

Jasper takes a step forward, and the woman can feel her eyes prying. As if she were seeing through her.

"Astrid," She finally speaks, staring at the human inside of Lapis' body.

"Listen, I know I don't know everything about Homeworld or your past, but I want to. I want to be with you and support you. I can't fix everything, but-" She is cut off as Jasper wipes a tear she hadn't even realized she had shed falling down her face. Astrid giggles and looks back up at the gem, "Jasper, I lo-"

Astrid's eyes snap open as she rushes out of bed to the toilet. She coughs up what feels like ten gallons of saltwater before she leans her weight onto the sink. When she looks up into the mirror, she almost feels as if she can feel someone staring back, but as soon as the feeling comes, it's gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! In this chapter I started doing introspection into Jasper and Lapis's characters. I also wanted to create a stronger relationship between the Crystal Gems and Astrid. Any and all feedback is appreciated!
> 
> <3


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